From Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Austere Academy.
“If you were going to give a gold medal to the least delightful person on earth, you would have to give that medal to a person named Carmelita Spats, and if you didn’t give it to her, Carmelita Spats was the sort of person who would snatch it from your hands anyway.”
First Sentence of a New World 