From Bill Cosby's Fatherhood
“So you’ve decided to have a child.”
“‘Try it again,’ Percy told me.”
From Rick Riordan's Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard: The Ship of the Dead
“When I was growing up, theater and music were my first loves, so my original show business goals revolved around being in musical comedies on Broadway, like Ethel Merman and Mary Martin.”
From Carol Burnett's In Such Good Company
“Did things ever get so outlandishly rock-bottom rotten that you went around muttering, not necessarily out loud, but muttering nonetheless: I don’t believe it!”
From James Kirkwood's P.S. Your Cat Is Dead
“MacGyver opened his eyes.”
From Melinda Metz's Talk to the Paw
“They say the best things in life are free.”
Tim Hawkins' Diary of a Jackwagon
“Lesson learned: If you take a Valkyrie out for coffee, you’ll get stuck with the check and a dead body.”
From Rick Riordan's Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard: The Hammer of Thor
“The first time I saw the Bionic Man I was covered in sparkles.”
From Susin Nielsen's Optimists Die First
“I trace the outline of my sister’s drawing, lungs molded from a sea of flowers.”
From Rachael Lippincott's Five Feet Apart
“Yeah, I know.”
From Rick Riordan's Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard: The Sword of Summer
“You may remember seeing me on TV when Jodie O’Rodeo saved the world.”
From Tom Angleberger's Fake Mustache
“Dear Mr. Richard Gere, In Mom’s underwear drawer–as I was separating her ‘personal’ clothes from the ‘lightly used’ articles I could donate to the local thrift shop–I found a letter you wrote.”
From Matthew Quick’s The Good Luck of Right Now
“There were two ostriches, a water buffalo, and a flock of wild turkeys between me and the registration desk.”
From Alison Cherry, Lindsay Ribar, and Michelle Schusterman's The Pros of Cons
“‘You sure about this?’ Rachel asked again, blowing softly on the surface of her steaming cup of tea.”
From Kevin Kwan's Crazy Rich Asians
“I don’t want to get up.”
From Sarah Andersen's Adulthood Is a Myth.
First Sentence of a New World 