From Lemony Snicket's File Under: 13 Suspicious Incidents
“One morning I was arguing with the adult in charge of me.”
“There was a town, and there was a train, and there was a murder.”
From Lemony Snicket's All the Wrong Questions: Why Is This Night Different from All Other Nights?
“There was a town, and there was a librarian, and there was a fire.”
From Lemony Snicket's All the Wrong Questions: Shouldn't You Be in School?
“There was a town, and there was a statue, and there was a person who had been kidnapped.”
From Lemony Snicket's All the Wrong Questions: When Did You See Her Last?
“There was a town, and there was a girl, and there was a theft.”
From Lemony Snicket's All the Wrong Questions: Who Could That Be at This Hour?
“Certain people have said that the world is like a calm pond, and that anytime a person does even the smallest thing, it is as if a stone has dropped into the pond, spreading circles of ripples further and further out, until the entire world has been changed by one tiny action.”
From Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Penultimate Peril.
“A man of my acquaintance once wrote a poem called ‘The Road Less Traveled,’ describing a journey he took through the woods along a path that most travelers never used.”
From Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Slippery Slope.
“After a great deal of time examining oceans, investigating rainstorms, and staring very hard at several drinking fountains, the scientists of the world developed a theory regarding how water is distributed around our planet, which they have named ‘the water cycle.'”
From Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Grim Grotto.
“When my workday is over, and I have closed my notebook, hidden my pen, and sawed holes in my rented canoe so that it cannot be found, I often like to spend the evening in conversation with my few surviving friends.”
From Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Carnivorous Carnival.
“There are two reasons why a writer would end a sentence with the word ‘stop’ written entirely in capital letters STOP.”
From Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Hostile Hospital.
“No matter who you are, no matter where you live, and no matter how many people are chasing you, what you don’t read is often as important as what you do read.”
From Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Vile Village.
“The book you are holding with your two hands right now–assuming that you are, in fact, holding this book, and that you have only two hands–is one of two books in the world that will show you the difference between the word ‘nervous’ and the word ‘anxious.'”
From Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Ersatz Elevator.
“If you were going to give a gold medal to the least delightful person on earth, you would have to give that medal to a person named Carmelita Spats, and if you didn’t give it to her, Carmelita Spats was the sort of person who would snatch it from your hands anyway.”
From Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Austere Academy.
“Sometime in your life– in fact, very soon– you may find yourself reading a book, and you may notice that a book’s first sentence can often tell you what sort of story your book contains.”
From Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Miserable Mill.
First Sentence of a New World 